(The original spam is in italics, my comments in bold. Stuff that's just needs attention is underlined)
Re: Payment Notification
We are writhing to know if it's true that you are DEAD? Yes, capitalize that. Because it might bring me back from the dead. Because we received a notification from one MR. GERSHON SHAPIRO of USA stating that you are DEAD and that you have giving him the right to claim your funds. What funds would those be? He stated you died on a CAR accident. Dying ON a car accident is a terrible way to go. He has been calling us regarding this issue, but we cannot proceed with him until we confirm this by not hearing from you after 7days. I'm glad they won't proceed without solid confirmation.
Be advised that we have made all arrangements for you to receive and confirm your funds without anymore stress, and without any further delays. All we need to confirm now is your been DEAD Or still Alive. These funds, the arrangements are ready to go to me, you say?
Because this MAN'S message brought shock to our minds. How shocking of this MAN! And we just can't proceed with him until we confirm if this is a reality OR not But if it happened we did not hear from you after 7days, then we say: MAY YOUR SOUL REST IN PERFECT PEACE" YOUR JOY AND SUCCESS REMAINS OUR GOAL. So, you wish me a successful and joyful death? Cool, thanks.
May the peace of the Lord be with you wherever you may be now.
Your Faitfully,
Mrs Farida Waziri
| Here's another one I received today.... |
Um, pretty sure he wants his money used for a cocoa processing machine!! Is it that hard to honor your dead husband's wishes? Especially after you think his business partners murdered him? Gee, maybe you helped?Mrs. Stephanie Adams.
My Dear one in Christ.
My name is Stephanie Adams the wife of late Mr. Adams Andrew , who served as a director in the Cocoa processing board before his untimely death after a long illness here in a hospital.
Though his death was suspected to be the hand work of his close associates who travelled to France with him shortly before he became ill. But I leave that to the Almighty because i took courage in what the bible said in Isaiah 35:7-10. See below for the actual passage, which of course has nothing to do with murderous business partners....
Before his death, he told me of a deposit of ($12.5 Million US dollars) which he wanted to use for the purchase of cocoa processing machine. This money is presently now in the finance company here in GHANA . We didn't have any children that is my reason for donating this money.
I am presently very ill in a hospital from the Stroke that happened to me shortly after the death of my husband. But if i remember what the Bible said in Ecc.7:8-9, again see below... actually about patience? then my heart is filled with gladness. I also thank God for the help and assistance i receiving from a nurse in the hospital who is also a believer (Nurse Felicia).
I want to donate this money for the service of God and his Children, and i want it to be used like i have said. And i believe God will guide you to achieve this purpose. In every situation, the bible teaches us that it is right to give thanks and praise to God.
Reply me very quickly so that i will inform you of the next step because of my worsening health condition and moreover, i am not worried or afraid of death because the bosom of the Lord is there for those of his children that served him in truth and spirit. Please pray for me.
May the Lord guide and add more anointing upon you.
Yours beloved Sister
Mrs. Stephanie Adams.
Isaiah 35:7-10
King James Version (KJV)
7And the parched ground shall become a pool, and the thirsty land springs of water: in the habitation of dragons, where each lay, shall be grass with reeds and rushes.
8And an highway shall be there, and a way, and it shall be called The way of holiness; the unclean shall not pass over it; but it shall be for those: the wayfaring men, though fools, shall not err therein.
9No lion shall be there, nor any ravenous beast shall go up thereon, it shall not be found there; but the redeemed shall walk there:
10And the ransomed of the LORD shall return, and come to Zion with songs and everlasting joy upon their heads: they shall obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away.
Ecclesiastes 7:8-9
King James Version (KJV)
8Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.
9Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.
Note to self: Quoting the Bible is great... It doesn't even have to fit into context!
Thank you, spammers!
Here's one I found in my spam folder:
ReplyDeleteAm writing this mail to you with tears and sorrow from my heart. With due respect trust and humanity, i appeal to you to exercise a little patience and read through my letter i feel to you.
I am MISS CHRISTINE MARIA REDMAN from England; I am 68 years old, Single Mother. I lost my children 7years ago on author motor accident ( Life has being miserable ) , I came to internet, because I needed a friend I could trust, to help me see the need of less-privileges I am suffering from a long time cancer of the breast which also affected my brain, according to my doctors they have advised me that I may not live for the next two months, this is because the cancer stage has gotten to a very bad stage.
I was brought up from a motherless babies home and has being working with Oil well in Iran, I came back to my country England because of my illness, as a matter of fact I have being in this sick bed for good 3years, all hospital bill are paid by Queen Elizabeth, as i served her when i was 14yrs old.
When i was working with the oil company in Iran I was able to save up to sum of $5million dollars deposited with (EUROPE) Presently, I'm with my laptop in a hospital where my doctors have told me that I have only a few months to live. It is my last wish to see that this money is invested to any organization of your choice and distributed each year among the charity organization, the poor and the motherless babies home where i come from. I want you use this money to fund, orphanages and widows, I took this decision, before i rest in peace because my time will soon be up.
Meanwhile, I want to tell you that as soon as i received your informations, I will do everything to make sure that this funds was been packaged in your name here and send it to you through diplomatic movement to your country, which i know going through bank to bank transfer may costs us much more, and also going to take you time to get due what happened in America on 9/11 about bombing, so i assured you that you always be with me as i assured you that both of us will work together as one and make sure that this fund get to you through diplomatic movement to your country, without any hitch as i have already discussed with my Agent of my bank (EUROPE).
As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you Instruction to the Bank to go ahead and release the fund to you as my Next of Kin to receive the fundd.
Get back to me with this email address: christine.redman157@gmail.com
Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I stated herein. Hoping to hearing from you soon.
Remain blessed.
Your Sister,
MISS CHRISTINE MARIA REDMAN
Candy, that's awesome! I love the ones where they create this elaborate story and character. Maybe if they were to take the time and learn proper grammar and punctuation, they could make money by writing a story instead of these scams! ;) But I enjoy reading these mini-novels. If a scammer can create an interesting character, I suppose I can too! ;)
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